A Season To Remember

My 2012 Season

How does one put months and months of  trips to the chiropractor, physical therapist and doctor, training, racing, and travel into words?  It has taken much reflection for me to even consider to begin to attempt to do so.  When thinking back over my racing season from start to finish I quickly note a theme, that being family and friends.  Not to dismiss the importance of my friends, but here I am solely going to focus on my family.

My racing became a family affair this season and I that made it something beyond what it normally is.  Everyone was involved with not with seeing and experiencing sacrifices because of my training, but also the joys and struggles that I experience during races.  I few key races that one or several family members decided to brave along with me were Bull Run Run, Western States and Run Rabbit Run.  

Bull Run Run

My season began in April as I ventured to Bull Run Run in Virginia.  My father offered to join me and crew for me during the 50 miles, and it was to be his first experience with me throughout an ultra.  I knew he must really love me because he too hates flying and this race required an aircraft.

From start to finish the excitement that he had for me during the race was contagious and gave me an indescribable feeling.  He was so eager for me to get in and out of aid stations and continue to push forth.  He seemed to be as competitive as I was, if not even more as I chased down friend and fellow Vermonter Bob Ayers.   As we exchanged bottles and fuel he documented the brief moments we saw each other.

Looking at the footage after we returned home just reiterated to me how much my family helps me along the way. I think my dad was hooked on the ultra scene after just one race, which made me just smile even bigger. A great way to start the season!

Western States

When the Shuttle Breaks Down...Make Friends

Geo and I flew out to Western States three days prior to the start.  It gave us some down time and time to hit all the needed grocery stores and such.  He enjoyed mountain biking with I held down the couch and drank Americanos.  We had some good laughs and meals together.  

The afternoon prior to the race my mother and step father flew into help crew. They knew the drill from the previous year, although since we were back to the regular course their day would be more comprehensive.  My family split the early aid stations making two crews and then rejoined at Forest Hill for the remainder of the race.  The hours and countless miles of driving and attending to details was appreciated and paid off.  I think they got in a solid workout with the amount I had them lugging around.  It was always reassuring to know that I would be taken care of at each crew station.  I knew they would be there, I knew they would have silence if I needed silence, or the correct advice/motivation if that's what was needed.  Mostly what they had was excitement and encouragement, while I truly had the feeling that my effort and performance was a team effort.                                     

An added bonus was that this year was the first time I had my mom pace me for a few little stints.  It was fun hitting our stride and we were all smiles the whole time.  As you can see above she made sure we led the way into the school as Nikki, Rory and their crews were right behind.  It even felt like we got competitive with each other as we headed down the last mile onto the track.  Geo would take the lead, then my mom and then I would push to keep up and pass.  No competitiveness in my family!

I am excited to know that they are again willing to join me at Western States this coming season.  It truly has been something I look forward too and having them there helps me toe the line with more confidence than I normally would have.  

Leadville

After finishing his epic bike race from one end of the Colorado Trail to the other end self supported I was lucky enough to spend a few days with Geo before he had to head back to Vermont.  I picked him up in Durango and then trucked him back to Leadville. He must really love me because within 24 hours of finishing his 5 days on his ridged single speed he was out with me hiking Hope Pass. He also did the hike in shoes that were a size too large as his sneakers where in Denver where he started his race. As the photo reveals though one of us had a bigger smile than the other. 

A week of exploring and hanging out at altitude with my father and step mother was a treat. We did some interesting shopping in downtown Leadville where you can buy anything from fresh made cookies to antique sheriffs badges.  Also with the Leadville 100 Mountain Bike Race, Transrockies and the Boom Days there was plenty to keep me occupied.   To keep active my dad and I did many early morning runs at Turquiose Lake together and even hiked up the Winfield side of Hope Pass.  It was the first time he had been over 8,000 feet hiking so very magical to see him power up to 12,000 +.  At the end of the hike he said "These bad boys are going to be sore!" as he pointed to his quads.  Of course throughout the time there, like parents often do, my step mother and dad spoiled me at Melanzana and at the grocery store, everything a gluten free vegan could ever want or need.  

When race day came we were all as prepared as we knew how to be.  The hugs I got before the race fueled me and we were off.  As the day progressed my running and health started to crumble.  I couldn't breathe and it was beyond an issue that my inhaler could solve.  I continued to press on, they continued to support me on the fly as we all tried and tried to make it work.  The wheels had not only come off, but my lungs had broken.   

Photos By: Rob Timko

Above my father was consoling me at the Twin Lakes aid station.  I couldn't breath and it wasn't getting better.  He held me tight and I knew no matter what he loved me.  I could come in first, last or not finish and it didn't matter to him, what matter was that I was okay.  I never told him, but I thought a lot about how strong he has been in life and perhaps how stubborn he has been too.  He has overcome numerous heart surgeries and continued to do what he loves.  Life isn't always comfortable, but ultimately we have to believe that we do know our bodies and what is possible.  

I continued the race and eventually finished even though it was far off what I had planned for.  I knew if I could keep making it to crew station after crew station all would be okay, they would ensure it.  After I finished and got medical attention my step mother gave me the "You scared us talk".  I learned a lot that day about myself and how much my dad and step mom do truly care for me.  

Run Rabbit Run

After some last minute piece work, as I had the belief that I still had a lot of legs and heart after Leadville I found myself back in Colorado to race Run Rabbit Run 100 miler.  A long way from home and a big task at hand my mother volunteered up my step father Jeff to join me and crew for me.  Due to work and an appointment Jeff would arrive in Steamboat around 12 AM the morning of the race.  Then after the race he would fly home to Burlington before heading to Washington D.C for work three hours later.  Talk about commitment and sacrifice!  I felt so honored and blessed to have him join me.  He is so attentive to details, from travel / race details to what I need, so I knew once we got rolling my race wouldn't come down to a lack or crew/support.  

"Having A Wonderful Day & Feeling Good"
Photo: Bryon Powell 

On race day frustration quickly emerged inside of me as just a few miles in I struggled to follow the course.  The foliage was completely breath taking as was the single track so I tried to stay focused.  By the first time I saw Jeff at the first crew station over 20 miles in I had already tacked on so many extra miles that I wanted to drop.  Several others were dropping and my mind automatically went to that place.  I felt so far behind, disoriented and was honestly afraid of losing the course in the dark.  Jeff gently encouraged me to continue for more miles to see if it got better.  I recall him saying, "Give it some more time".    

For several miles things did get better, as I had Jenny Pierce for company.  Then after departing ways with her I continued on my way solo once again.  Jeff was waiting for me in Steamboat to help run me through traffic on the main roads.  I will never forget his outfit.  He was dressed more for warmth than pacing, but I think he easily won the award for most trendy.  A Burton button down flannel collared shirt was the key article of key pacing/crewing attire that made me smile. Unfortunately I have no photo of his outfit or us together from this race so I have a photo documenting me eating what an aid station worker told me was gluten free and vegan.  Instant mashed potatoes with bacon, YUM!

After a few more loops over the mountain and back into Steamboat I saw the sun start to rise.  I had made it through an entire night of darkness, which almost seemed impossible to me.  I knew that I had banked too many extra miles to my body to make the finish realistic without putting myself in a huge hole.  My mind and heart hadn't been in the race for hours and they were not to be convinced on this day.  As I ran towards Jeff I said "I'm done".  He hugged me with a sigh of relief and then I walked over to the check-in table and said I was dropping.  Jeff and I got in the car and drove off and it was great to feel the support despite having not have accomplished what we had originally intended too.  

Family Fun!

I am blessed to have a family who supports me as I pursue my passion.  They are the voice of encouragement, and when I need it, the voice of reason.  The moments that we have shared are so valuable and memorable.  It gives me great joy and energy to see them smiling out on the course.  Knowing that beyond the pain, darkness, cold, heat or whatever, they will be waiting to comfort me in anyway possible.  

Run Bryon Run!

As I scurried around Steamboat frantically I tried to locate my lost luggage through United Airlines customer service line and simultaneously devise a back up plan.   During my moments of organized chaos I also attended the Run Rabbit Run pre-race meeting and caught up with fellow runners.  Eventually I received word that my bag had arrived at the condo unit and as I looked at my watch I had just 15 minutes to assemble my drop bags before the cut off.  After throwing a bunch of clothes and fuel into bags I ran around the village like a lost puppy trying to find my way to the drop bag location and in the process I stubbled into Mr. Bryon Powell.  

With video camera in tow I knew that he was out preparing his intel for the upcoming race.  I ignored the camera and since I hadn't run since arriving in Colorado I inquired if he would join me for an easy shake out run.  He said yes and he asked if we could do an interview and I think I proceeded to changed the subject.  For some reason I was really giggly and smiley on this eve and was having a hard time committing to doing the 5 minute or less talk.  Maybe it was the lack of sleep, stress and/or pre-race nerves.  We wondered around the village as the sun began to set and I dug in my heels.  I finally agreed, but also disagreed, as I argued that I am not interesting and two interviews was plenty for the season. In my mind I thought there was no need to bore the irunfar reads with more on me and came to the conclusion that someone who is far more interesting and not often investigated was Bryon.  

As Bryon joined me in front of the camera I hesitated in fear, but took over.  I wasn't sure if he would roll with it or if we would start over.  I felt like as the seconds passed and then minutes we both settled into the idea.  It was an honor to ask him so questions as I think highly of him as a coach, reporter, writer and friend.  Seriously think about it, where else can you keep up with ultrarunning news to the degree that his site allows?  His work emxemplifies his passion and dedication to the sport and his patience with me is priceless.    

I honestly hate hearing or watching myself, but this video will always make me smile.  I felt so nervous, so awkward, but at the same time enjoyed every moment of it.  Bryon has shown me that it can be difficult and daunting to follow your dreams, but despite this, it is possible.  Like ultra running, life and your career can having highs and lows, but it is how you ride them out and work with each that determines how things end up.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

CHECK IN

As I stood in line to do medical and check in I was enlightened about the prize money Pearlizium was offering up to the first male and first female to the top of Hope Pass Outbound.  Wow, $500 sure did sound nice.  Cold hard cash...would the IRS be chasing the recipients down the backside of Hope Pass? I did think about the money longer than I would have imagined, but kept coming to the conclusion that it just wasn't worth the race to me.   I did imagine though that the money might change some racers race plans.  Would anyone be willing to race to the top?  All and all, having the money out there, just seemed to make me more nervous. The more I thought about it the more I thought that in all honesty I would have rather seen Pearl give the winners the money.  Needless to the money gave me something to dwell on as I stood in line.  Yes I passed medical check in, no need for a pulse as long as you weighed something and had paid the entry fee you were fit to toe the line.  I was given an aggravating timing bracelet on my wrist and I felt like part of a hospital gang or like I was under house arrest.  I really wanted to bedazzle it and make Rory proud, but there wasn't a craft store in the area to be found.

START TO MAYQUEEN
Around 3:50 AM everyone started making their way into the start area. Despite the early hour there was a good vibe and buzz in the air.  I looked to those around me and wished them luck.  There was nothing I could do now, but relax and do my best to enjoy the day.  I know that I had worked hard to prepare for this race and now I needed to execute and remain patient.

Photo By: Rob Timko 

The shotgun fired and we were off as a pace car lead us out of town.  A few miles in I looked at those around me, Darcey, Liza, Tina and Tony?  I thought to myself, "How crazy is this, I am running next to Tony Krupicka!"  He commented on how fast the boys were setting off and that he had never run the start of Leadville with girls before.  Once off the paved and dirt roads the field started to settle and I was running in second not too far behind Liza.  A few miles of single track around Turquoise Lake as we passed a few campgrounds before seeing our crews for the first time.  At this point I just wanted to take it easy and warm up.  Campers had early morning fires going and the smoke combine with the cold air was not playing nice with my lungs.  I used my inhaler and didn't put any thought into it as being an issue for the remainder of the race.   I had planned on ditching my light at Mayqueen, but the sun seemed slow to rise so I held on to it.

MAYQUEEN TO PIPELINE
My parents were ready to swap packs and trade my visor for buff.  Without stopping we handed off and now I was eager to get to the Colorado Trail.  Just a short stint of uphill pavement and we would be in the woods and back on trail.  Just over 13 miles in and the massive field had already started to really spread.  I could see Liza up ahead and was running with a gentlemen named Jason and Paul Terranova.  We made what seemed like quick work of the trail and by the time we hit Hagerman Pass (dirt road) I was able to turn my headlamp off.

Photo By: Matt Trappe

Once on the road Liza seemed to open her legs up, but I stayed with my trusty pace.  Just about a mile on this road before we would start climbing Sugarloaf.  I knew that the entire 2 plus mile climb was runnable so again I harped on patience.  By the time we had plateaued on Sugarloaf I was about 10 seconds back from Liza.  On the climb we had be blessed with one of the most beautiful sunrises I have ever seen.  A blazing pink fireball slowly rose in front of us shedding light on the mountains and lake were we had just emerged. On the downhill I gave Liza lots of room as we worked our way down the notorious  rutted out power lines section.  Then as we turned onto the pavement road at the bottom she and I exchanged conversation before heading into the Fish Hatchery aid station.  I swapped my pack for a handheld, my headlamp for sunglasses, took a sip of fuel and was off and running as I was eager to get the next section of pavement over with.  I looked at my watch and was faster than planned.  I thought about my effort and pace.  I felt very comfortable and in control so continued to roll with it.

Before I knew it I was running with Mike Arstein (The Fruitarian) and we did some catching up.  I then reverted to listening to my ipod for a bit to help me get over the pounding of the pavement.  Straight and flat, urgh but I could dream of the mountains as we were surrounded by them.  Eventually we made a right hand turn onto a trail that followed a fence line, this was one of the course changes so I didn't really know what to expect.  Luckily before I knew it we were upon our crews again and I gave up my handheld for my pack as the next section was long.

PIPELINE TO TWIN LAKES

Photo By: Leadville 100

This next section was one of my favorites.  Everything felt so remote, not a house in sight, not a car to be heard, nothing but nature and you.  Mike Arstein said something along the lines of "We are over a quarter of the way done already!"  Wanting to still run my own race I let the guys get a bit ahead of me. It was on this section that it really started to dawn on me that I hadn't walked yet.  All and all the terrain had been extremely runnable and I wasn't working hard so was that okay? I honestly really didn't know the answer.  I focused on enjoying the trail and staying on top of fueling and hydration.  The temperature was finally coming up and a beautiful day was in the works, but again my breathing was off.  Still it strike me as something to really place worry on since I really haven't had major asthma issues in years.  At the Mount Elbert aid station, just about 3-4 miles shy of Twin Lakes I decided to top off my pack.  Off course it turned into a major struggle for the volunteers to get the top back on my blatter and they were slow to turn what they deemed a puzzle back over to me.

Finally off and running again I was loving the gentle downhill single track, it felt like a playground.  The gentle grade eventually turned into some steeper jeep road with loose gravel and rock.  As I headed down the last short grade to the aid station I went to put the brakes on and my feet slid out from underneath me.  I went backwards and went down.  The crowd at the aid station gasped and not knowing what to do I got back up and threw my arms up in the air.  Thankfully this lead to cheers, phew I guess I turned that one around.

TWIN LAKES TO WINFIELD
A fresh pack and I was now mentally focused on crossing the stream and making my way up Hope Pass.  The field section leading to the river crossing felt mind numbing, but luckily there were people out cheering.  I had really feared that the stream crossing would stop me dead in my tracks, but it actually felt refreshing.  After crossing I was followed by a Salomon photographer for a while and then was alone.  As I hit the base of the climb I went from a run to a walk.  I had no intent on running any portion of the climb.  I knew if I hiked it would save energy and in the scheme of things time.  Mike A. passed me on the hike up and reminded me to eat and focus on getting a lot of calories in on the climb.  I had no intent in keeping up with him and wanted to continue to do my thing.  I had practiced this part of the course 3 times so knew the terrain and what I was in for.

Photo By: Salomon

Photo By: Pearlizium Craziness on Top of Hope Pass

As I came across the Hopeless aid station I topped off my pack, said hello to the llama's, thanked those who had trekked up to volunteer at the aid station and then continued on my way.  I could see the saddle and focused on getting there as I sipped on my fresh water.  After a few switch backs I peered back to see if anyone was in sight. There was no one in eyes view so I stayed with my easy rhythm as I took in the views.  When I crested the top and was greeted by some very enthusiastic spectators from Pearlizium.  They congratulated me and asked if I wanted the $500 now or later.  I smiled and said "Now of course!" And one of them responded with doubt saying "Really?".  Apparently they were not really prepared for a yes response as they went to dig it out of a bag off the trail.  I tucked the money into my hydration pack, thanked them as I  looked around at the views and then headed down.  Once out of sight I took a pee break and then continued down the trail making sure not to pound my quads.

Photo By: Matt Trappe

I came to the intersection near the bottom and veered right onto the new trail.  It was beautiful, but it seemed to be holding heat like an oven.  The temperature felt good, but again my asthma seemed to be getting the best of me even though my pace was normal.  About a mile on the new trail and to my left I could see a large cluster of cars parked at Winfield, I was getting close.

WINFIELD TO TWIN LAKES
The crowd was lively at the turn around and I moved in and out without much slowing.  Jumping on the scale in stride and only being about a half of pound of my original weight I took off without thought.  In retrospect this may have been a mistake.  A new pack on my back and Meredith and I headed out and shortly thereafter saw Liza headed in.  We started uphill and immediately my heart rate spiked drastically.  I felt like my heart was going to explode.  Never before had I felt it beat so prominently.  We stuck with a light run until we reached the drastic incline that marked the start of the climb back up Hope.  Meredith handed me my poles, but at that point I wasn't really getting enough air in to make sense of what to do with them.  I was moving at a snails pace, but my heart rate was racing.  I didn't know what to do, nothing seemed to remedy the problem so we kept plugging away one small, slow step at a time.

Finally out of the trees and onto the sweeping switchbacks we could see Liza not far behind.  To be honest I didn't worry, all I could focus on was the idea that I thought my heart was going to explode.  I thought about what a mess it would make and how it would suck to have to drag my sticky body off of the pass.  I felt bad for those who would have to complete that task.  Finally as we came to the top Liza and her pacer passed us and went blazing down.  Not able to take a deep breathe I was not blazing, but rather just trying to stay upright.  I still had faith that my breathing issues would resolve and Meredith reassured me that once we got lower things would improve.  Even though I didn't feel like it was altitude, but I still believed her.

Down, down, down we went as we navigated our way past those coming up.  My legs wanted to fly down the hill, but I couldn't.  By the time we hit the flat section that lead us back to Twin Lakes I felt like I was breathing threw a pinched straw. We crossed the river and shortly thereafter I fell to all fours and started to dry heave.  Frustrated and angry I eventually got back up and kept moving and then was passed by Tina who was looking like a rockstar. We then came across Meghan Hicks who immediately knew something was wrong.   I couldn't think, I felt like I was done, that Twin Lakes would be the end for me and at that moment I was ready for the end and some help.

I made my way into the Twin Lakes aid station and my father greeted me and then heard my breathing. He hugged me and said "That's enough dear, your done!"  I don't blame him.  I sat in a chair, tried not to breathe, because it hurt so much and heard my pacers deciding to switch me over from a pack to bottles so not to have the constriction and weight on my chest.

TWIN LAKES TO FISH HATCHERY

Photo By: Salomon

My father walked away and I was told to start up the hill.  I walked up the hill and remember doing so because I didn't want to be stared at as I struggled to breathe.  I got to the top of the hill and wanted to sit against a tree, but was greeted by Amy Lane, Brian R. and Dave James.  Such great words of encouragement and support as they kept me standing.  We started to move up the trail and I don't really know how it happened or even why.  Eventually Adam Chase came up behind me to take over the pacing duties.  I had my poles and he was carrying two handhelds for me.  We walked many of the uphill sections and then in my mind made quick work of the downhills.  My body was now starting to reject shot blocks and gu was out of the question.  Despite this I tried to stay on top of hydration and salt.

Truly frustrated I tried to keep my head in it.  If only my breathing could keep up with my legs.  We made it to Pipeline, refilled bottles, gave up poles and then ran all the way to the pavement section that would bring us back to the Fish Hatchery.  Once on the pavement my stomach went sour.  I felt like the hard surface would make me puke if I ran so I walked.  Adam entertained me with story after story as we walked and walked.  I apologized for being slow and pathetic, because that's what I felt like.  I think he should have made me run a mile for every story he told.  Either way we made it to Fish Hatchery and Adam turned me back over to Meredith.

FISH HATCHERY TO MAYQUEEN
With poles back in hand the plan was to try to keep the heart rate and breathing under control as we made our way up power lines.  The sun was finally starting to set, but the temperature was still solid.  We were joined on the climb up by Paul and his pacer Drew.  Paul kept me entertained with his duck like walking, which was brought on by sore quads.  I am not sure why I found this so amussing, but I did.  Once we crested and started down the backside of Sugarloaf we were forced to turn on our lights. We took it easy as I focused on staying upright.  The night sky was spectacular with not a cloud, just stars as far as the eye could see.  I thought a lot about my husband and hoped that he too was looking up at the sky.

Amazingly I made it down Sugarloaf in one piece and we turned right onto Hagerman Pass.  Paul wasn't far behind by the time we hit the Colorado Trail.  We noticed lights behind us and it turned out to be Ashley Nordell and her pacer Sean.  We let them go past as they were making much quicker work of this section than I was.  I cheered Ashley on, she is an amazing runner and person.  I had sore spots on my feet so I was babying them on the technical sections.  I needed to land just right to avoid the pain.  I had faith that I would make up some time on the short road section leading into Mayqueen. As Meredith and I made our way off the trail and onto the Pavement we almost got plowed by an oncoming minivan.  Not really something you want to deal with 87 miles into a race, but with Mayqueen in sight we focused on getting in and out quickly.

MAYQUEEN TO FINISH
Leaving Mayqueen I was about 10 seconds back from Ashley as we headed down the road towards the trail that would lead us around Turquoise Lake.  She had me pass her before entering the trail and this made me nervous.  I knew my breathing wasn't good and that they would want to go past in a short period of time.  Meredith and I would run and then my breathing would lag behind so I would be forced to walk.  My legs wanted to go!  Finally I had to resort to literally saying "Slow" to my legs.  I tried desperately to find a pace for my legs that my breathing could keep up with.  As expected many of the campers along the lake were out cheering us on and had fires.  I kept cursing them inside my head because the simple pleasure of a nice campfire was killing me.

Over the next few miles I would gap Ashely and then be forced to walk.  She did a great job with her pacer keeping things under control.  We hit the road at the end of the lake not far apart.  Now the tempeature was really starting to drop and the cold air just componded my issues once again.  She went past and I couldn't respond and that was the last I saw of her.  I started to walk and within a few minutes my stomach went from bad to worse. I stopped dead on the side of the road surrounded by nothing, but darkness and cold.  Of course Mer was there, but for her sake I wish she hadn't been.  I started puking.  I would puke and then try to breathe, puke again and then try to get some air.  I felt like I threw up 8-10 times in a row.  Stomach clearing, just all out puking.  Down the road we saw lights and it was Paul and Drew.   Paul asked what we were doing and then noticed the puddle between my legs.

Now empty, cold and short on air we continued.  My teeth were chattering, my body was shaking, my lungs and ribs sore, but I knew we had to move even if all I could do was walk.  So that's what we did for the last 3-4 miles, we walked.  It was frustrating, it was hard, but we did it.  As we came to the last stretch Meredith told me that at the car on the right we would run.  We came to the car and my walk became a "run".  My dad met us about 2 blocks from the finish and we all ran in together.  I vaguely remember crossing the line, I was told it was a time of 21:14 and then I was immediately being greeted by the medical personel.  Off to the medical tent to get some help after a long day of battling with not being able to breathe.

AFTERTHOUGHTS
Thanks to my crew, my pacers, coach, volunteers and all those supporting me out there, it truley was a team effort on this day.  I honestly couldn't do what I do without everyone and whether your words of encouragement came via email, text or phone call prior to the race or in person on race day they all helped carry me each step of the way.  Also thanks to my sponsors for the great products you make and for continuing to believe in me.  Leadville truly is a special town and I am grateful that I had the opportunity to be welcomed there will open arms.

RACE DAY GEAR
Shoes - Salomon Sense
Pack - Salomon SLab
Socks - Drymax Cycle Sock
Glasses - Julbo Trek
Watch - Suunto Ambit
Poles - Black Diamond Ultra Distance Z-Poles

VT To Leadville~Great Living @ 10,200 Feet

Colorado, a beautiful place, but not home. My trip started with connecting with a long time childhood friend and ice hockey teammate Anna in Aurora, Colorado. She and her family were kind enough to share their home and gluten free/vegan stash. Even though I wasn't at home they sure did make this Vermonter feel as if she was. My running was supplemented with the kids planning activities for me such as floor hockey, swimming, x-box connect, soccer, Olympic updates and arts & crafts. To be honest it was comical, yet special, to have a second grader read me a bed time story as a kindergartner peered at my sleepy eyes and made sure I was tucked in tight.  

After a hard goodbye, which lead way to a promise to return soon I left the Denver area and head for the mountains to do some training on course. A friend of a friend had graciously agreed to let me stay with him for a week. Shortly upon arrival in Leadville Chris and I went out for a short run so I could stretch my legs out. We decided on running an out and back on a early dirt section of the course. As anticipated I felt like I had been dragged by the airplane to Colorado.  All and all I felt sluggish, heavy and just couldn't find my stride. I chalked it up to travel, inconsistent meals and the reality of coming from sea level to altitude. That evening Chris and I walked downtown to see what was happening for the Boom Days festivities in town. Before I knew what was going on a gun fight broke out. Okay it was a staged gun fight, but in the moment I had no idea. Very nice to meet you Chris, now let me dive behind you to use you as a shield.  I never really did understand the craziness of the Boom Days, but I think that this made them highly intriguing.

The next day brought an opportunity to run Hope Pass. Chris and I started on the Twin Lakes side and headed down the Winfield side. Rumor was that the new trail section at the bottom would not be used during the race because the permits were not granted, but we ran it anyways. The new trail was well built and added a little more climbing. I really enjoyed the sections of aspen trees and the views. After arriving at the camp ground near Winfield we turned around and headed back up the pass. It didn't take long to realize that this side is much steeper than the other, although the trade off is constant views.  On the return trip up I ran out of water and after two plus years of playing it safe after getting giardia I filled my pack with stream water.  Very cold, refreshing and hopefully plague free.  

Once Chris and I got back to the car I had 5 missed calls. My husbands mountain bike training partner Marc wanted to let me know that George was on schedule to finish the Colorado Trail Race (502 miles self supported) that evening. After getting back to the apartment I threw a few things in my backpack, made an almond butter sandwich and Durango became my next stop. 

On my drive there I was receiving tracking updates from Marc and my mom. About two hours into the drive I was told that Geo had stopped moving, an hour passed and he still wasn't moving. My first thought was that it was a break to eat or a mechanical issue. Then another hour passed without movement and I started to fear that he or the guy he had been riding with had sustained a serious injury. Finally after no moment for about 2.5 hours my mom phoned to tell me he was back to life. A little over 5 hours later I arrived at a trail head in Durango and asked others in the parking lot if I was in the right stop. Alyssa Wildeboer was quick to introduce herself and put the pieces together that our husbands we riding together. I also realized she too was running the Leadville 100. We chatted, paced back and forth and called others for updates. We finally received news that Travis and George had decided to seek shelter under a small pine tree because an electrical storm had moved in. They both napped rather than dodging lightening and that explained their lack of movement for hours.  

CTR-5 Days-502 Miles

Eventually I got impatient and started heading up the trail. It was getting dark and of course I hadn't thrown a headlamp in my pack. I had this hunch that just a little further and then a little further beyond that I would see them. Shortly after that I saw two lights headed towards me and I skittishly said "George? Travis?" before I knew it Geo was off his bike with his arms wrapped around me. I shook Travis's hand and told the boys to get it done. What an inspiring endeavor and very motivational for helping me prepare for my race.  Some photos, food and conversation at the finish and then we were off to find a hotel.  The next morning after Geo impressed me with his breakfast (2 full size waffles with peanut butter and honey, fruit, yogurt, chips, cinnamon bun, etc.) Now with a halfway hungry biker who was also barefoot we headed to Leadville. A stop for shoes, clothes, more food before hundreds of miles of driving. 

Hope Pass 12,600 Feet

The next day Chris and I headed out for an out and back from the east end of Turquoise Lake to the top of Sugarloaf. On this run it dawned on me that is course scared me because of its ruannability. Miles and miles of terrain that could be run. 

The following day brought a trip to Denver to drop Geo at the airport and another opportunity to spend some time with Anna and her family. After a good night sleep she sent me off back to Leadville with homemade gluten free brownies, cookies and cinnamon raisin bread. In the midst of driving I was able to arrange company for a Hope Pass out and back with Salomon teammate Jen Segger. It was a pleasure to get to know her and the next day we met up with Ashley Nordell to tackle the power lines section. I don't often get to train with females so I really enjoyed our time together.  

2,000 Bikers Streaming Past

Oh yes power lines, mountain bikers, the Leadville 100 mtn bike. The roads, trails and town were becoming overrun with lycra, shaved legs and expensive bikes. I couldn't pass up the opportunity to watch the start as approximately 2,000 bikers rolled to the line.  From what I saw of their course it appeared to be more of a road race on mountain bikes, but what do I know. The gun went off as I cheered for a new found friend Garret and then I ventured to Turquoise Lake for a run.  A nice run, a dip in the lake and I was now headed back to Denver to meet my parents who would be crewing for me. I was becoming overly familiar with the drive between Leadville and Denver. Alas this was the last time I would have to make the trek before the race.  

With just under a week until I toed the line I partook in a few short runs with Paul and Meredith Terranova and a hike up Hope Pass with my father as I tried to keep myself in check yet happy. Slowly throughout the week the town had emptied of bikers and filled with runners. 

My Dad Taking in the Views Headed Up Hope

I had the opportunity to connect with more Salomon teammates and watch the start of day two of the Transrockies. Also great to see and cheer for fellow New England runners Amy Lane, Brian R, and Dave James.  When I ran TRR two years ago I enjoyed the opportunity, but was happy that I didn't have to race 6 days in a row this year.  

As much fun as I was having socializing in the coffee shop, training with new and familiar faces and taking into the sights it was time for final preparations. Medical check in, drop bags, racer meeting, pacer coordinating, crew details, so many details to finalize as the race quickly approached.  

Run Strong, Be Brave, Breathe!

PRERACE

Belief, remember that word, hold it tight even when it tries to escape over and over.  I have been told I am capable, I have been told that I am a strong runner, yet I have a hard time allowing myself to believe people.  My perception is the opposite, although if other people believe in me could I?  I knew that this year I wanted to toe the line at Western States with more faith in myself, because self doubt makes each element of that race seem ten times harder.

The days leading up to the race I tried to stay calm and balanced.  I did my best not to compare myself to others as we all shared moments at Starbucks, passed each other on shake out runs or stepped on scales next to one another.  I am what I am and ready or not the race was here.  I knew I could go into the race and show what I was capable of or I could be self defeating and run half heartedly.  My strategy for the race was to run my race, stay positive and have fun.  Simple as that.

START LINE TO DUNCAN CANYON (Start to Mile 23.8)

WSER 2012 Start Line-Photo By: Emma Garrard/Salomon

As the masses emerged at the start line, I looked around and was surrounded by what I would deem greatness.   A highly competitive men’s and women’s field, volunteers, spectators, crews, pacers, family and friends all embracing the unexpected elements and what may lie ahead.  I felt so nervous, but then again if I didn't something would probably be wrong.

Escarpment- Photo By: Bob MacGillivray

As the countdown to the gun began I hugged the female runners around me and wished them luck, a safe time on course and then we were off.  I quickly fell into stride and knew there was no reason to extend myself on the first 3.5-mile climb out of Squaw.  I kept my pace comfortable and eventually settled into a little group of comprised of Rory Bosio, Paul Terranova, Josh Katzman and a few others.  By the time we were mid way up the wind was strong and I tried to seek some refuge by tucking behind the men.  With the strong and gusty wind there was no reason to run the steeper sections.  Rather it seemed we would all put our heads down, lean into the wind and try not to lose our hats and visors.   After passing the top of the tram I glanced at my watch to note 37:00 minutes and was cresting the top of Escarpment around 50 minutes and it was here that I was treated to my first cheers and smiles from Bob MacGillivray from Drymax Socks who was hunkered down with other photographers.   

Duncan Canyon Photo By: Glen Tachiyama

At this point Lizzy Hawker and Joelle Vaught were a long ways out of site and mind.  Ellie and Rory were making quick work of the downhill single track and self doubt was gaining on me.  I imagined that any moment a huge pack of females who were smiling and barely working were going to go flying by me and I would never see them again.  I refocused on the moment, on my race plan and tried to regain that belief that I could do this.   I knew I needed to settle into my race and not get wrapped up in chasing or worrying about who was lurking behind since we were merely a few miles into the day.  The field was now sorting out and spreading further over the miles.  Paul and I were together again and then were eventually joined by one of my international Salomon teammates David Kadunc from Slovenia along with a few others.  The males were gentlemanly and let me lead the way as we made our way to Red Star Ridge.  The pace I chose was whatever kept me warm enough to not become hypothermic, but slow enough to not overextend so early in the race.  At this point I was soaked to the bone and struggled to perform any function that required the usage of my hands.  Even though the conditions were not what Western States participants experience on race day I felt a sense of comfort, Nikki Kimball and I joked a lot about how it was just like we were in Vermont running on Mount Mansfield or Camels Hump.  A little rain, some hail, gusty wind, slick rocks, border line hypothermic, yeah just like at home.  During these early sections Nikki and I would be together and then separated due to each others strengths and weaknesses.  As we approached downhills she would just mention that she would see me in a while on the next climb and it was nice that we both continued to run our own races while valuing the time we did have together.


DUNCAN CANYON TO DEVILS THUMB (Mile 23.8 to Mile 47.8)

I quickly realized as I came into the Duncan Aid Station how alive the crew stations were going to be.  Last year we didn't see our crews until Michigan Bluff because of snow and this year despite the cold temps and unpredictable sky the crews and fans were loud and extremely supportive.  I almost blew by my mother who had another Salmon S-Lab pack to swap out with me.  She tried to convince me to take another layer, but at that point I felt like it would just add another layer of wetness and weight.  Now my focus became getting through the next 6 miles to Robinson Flats were my husband George would be waiting to crew for me.  David and I were still together and started to share some conversation.  After I took a spill on a loose corner he helped pick me up while mentioning that if I had Salomon shoes on I wouldn't have that problem.  I giggled and shared with him that I was a member of the US Salmon team and that I had the Salomon Crossmax on.  My left leg was now sore after landing on it. My thoughts started flashing back to last year when I fell on the snow and then struggled the rest of the race.  I ran gingerly for a few minutes trying to fight back the doubt signals my freshly cut and bruised left leg were sending me.  

Heading into Dusty Corners Photo By: Glen Tachiyama

Just after exiting the Milers Defeat Aid station I fell into a mud pit and banged my right knee.  My entire right side from socks up to my elbow was caked in mud.  Both my gloves were completely soaked in mud and every time I scratched my nose or face I would leave a streak of dirt.  I now felt like Pigpen.  A few miles after the Millers Defeat aid station we came across Mike Wardian, who I pulled up next to and said "I don't believe we have ever met" as he glanced at me.  I then said "Please don't get me wrong I know exactly who you are, I just don't think we have met before." It was amazing to share some miles with this runner, father and husband.  We also caught and ran with Joelle Vaught for a while and then once I passed her I was running in 4th position with Nikki looming close behind.  At Dusty Corners the running pack shown above was dissolved as David and I pulled away.  We continued to stay together sharing conversation about everything from significant others to Salomon products.

DEVILS THUMB TO FORESTHILL (Mile 47.8 to Mile 62)
David and I crossed the swinging bridge and ran the first short section of Devils Thumb before settling into a hike.  Here I worked on keeping a solid pace with getting some calories and fluid in me.  I kept looking down the switchbacks to see if I could catch a glimpse of Nikki, but no sign at this point.  The temperature on the hike up was much more pleasant this year than last and as we approached the top I saw Rory just 2 switchbacks in front of us.  Once at the aid station I had the volunteers refill my pack while Rory was having a blister worked on.

Now with a bedazzled Rory with me I could breathe and let go of some worry.  Last year I had come across her on approximately around the same time.  Rory and I were both happy to see each other and had 2-3 males tag on behind us.  As we made our way past Deadwood Cemetery we soon came across JB who was filming.  After commending him for his movie Unbreakable I told him I had a brilliant idea, that being he should do a film on the ladies of Western States.  As he continued with us Rory stole the show with jokes, songs and even some trail porn.  It was very apparent that our conversational topics were probably much more different than those being had between Geoff, Anton, Kilian and Hal. The gentlemen who were running behind us were certainly entertained for countless miles. JB stuck with us for a long time his showing his impressive ability to run, film and converse all at the same time.

Glen & Geo and Cowboy Paul Photo Shoot? Photo By: Bret Rivers

Soon after we parted ways with JB were joined by Nikki as we floated down the trail with what we were telling everyone was girl power.  It was such an honor to run so many miles with both Nikki and Rory, both are unique, strong females who bring a lot to the sport.  I believe it was Nikki who at one point said it felt like we were all out for a long training run together, we were all just so relaxed around each other trying to enjoy the shared moments despite the fact that we were "racing". These are the moments that I cherish, the ones that we are all out there enjoying ourselves, each others company and the amazing course that we were blessed with.  Also at this random moment I want to give a shout out to all the film crews and photographers who braved the bad weather and the clear skies throughout the day.  It is great to see them all out there, to say hello and then see their pieces of work online.  Truly inspiring to me and I am grateful.

We all came blazing into Michigan Bluff together and stomped on the timing mat while it made a horrendous sound, maybe we overloaded it with our demand that three timing chips be recognized at the same moment.  I weighed in just a half of pound heavier than my start weight and then grabbed a fresh pack from George and got major smiles and pats on the back from teammate Glen Redpath.  Glen filled me in on the race and told me today I was racing for third.  That was exciting, yet scary for me.  Look at who I was racing, these ladies are studs!  Rory and I left the aid station together knowing that Nikki would catch up on the downhill.  We ran the downs and flats and then hiked the exposed dirt road up to the left hand turn that would send us in the right direction towards Volcano Creek and then Bath Road. Once on the downhill single track Nikki was again in our group as we took turns leading and setting the pace. We continued to hike the steeper uphills while chatting away.  Once at Volcano Creek I took one step into the water and my foot slipped.  Down and in I went.  My right hamstring went into convulsion and I had a major moment of panic.  Really, this how my race was going to end?  Rory help me right myself while she put a positive spin on the fact that at least now I was clean.  After a few minutes it was back to normal and before I knew it we were almost to the bottom of Bath Road.

Mom & I Heading Into Foresthill- Photo By: Serena Wilcox

As we arrived to the bottom of the road there were loads of cheers from Nikki's fan club and Rory's as well, but were was my Mommy? We all headed up the road together and once near the top I found my mom who then ran me into Foresthill.  I would imagine we would like a huge pack because of the amount of people that were joining us for that section into FH, it felt like a moving party.

FORESTHILL TO RUCKY CHUCKY/GREEN GATE (Mile 62 to Mile 79.8)

Mer & I Leaving Foresthill- Photo By: ?

After weighing in precisely at my pre-race weight I was given the thumbs up to continue on.  I ran through the rest of the elongated aid station to join my pacer Meredith Terranova and to grab a new hydration pack from George.  Within moments Mer and I were in sync and hitting our stride.  Now with pacer by my side and a fresh pack on my back we were off and headed down towards the river.  Just 16 miles to get there and this is one of my favorite sections because of all the downhill switchback sections. The temperature stayed very comfortable and I still felt fueled and rather fresh considering how many miles I had already run.  The long stretch of the cheering crowd keep my pace honest as we worked our way off the main road back onto the trail.  I knew that Rory and Nikki had both stopped to attend to details with their crews, therefore spending a little bit longer at Foresthill.  Thus, for the moment the trail was extremely quiet with just the footfall from Mer and I.

Knowing what strong downhillers both ladies are I had zero doubt in my mind that they would soon be upon us.  Despite this I still wanted to continue to focus on myself, knowing that there were still many miles left in the race.  For moments between Peachstone and Fords Bar and then Fords Bar and the river we would hear conversation behind us, but the ladies and their pacers never caught us.  Thinking that we would be crossing the river on foot Mer and I devised a plan because I am a huge sissy when it comes to cold water.  As we approached the crossing all I could smell was BBQ and that made me run faster, not because I wanted some but because I needed to get past the smell as soon as possible.  Just before reaching the waters edge a volunteer stopped us and said "life jackets" and I couldn't figure out why.  Then we realized we were getting a boat ride across.

Myself, Rory & Pacers Photo By: Glen Tachiyama

With Rory up by the aid station we gave the go ahead for the rower to wait for her.  Once all in the boat we were shoved off and quickly rowed to the adjacent side.  After getting out of the boat my husband George greeted me with a big smile and cheers.  Now for the fun part, the lovely climb up to Green Gate.  With pacers, crew and friends Rory and I started to walk up to Green Gate.  We both worked on refueling and telling stories to those who had missed magical moments on the trail with us.  I was grateful that the sun wasn't beating down on us on this section like last year.  The temperature was comfortable now that the skies had cleared and the sun was out.  About 2/3 of the way up the climb my mother joined us and after a few minutes I mentioned that I would be grabbing my pack and not handhelds from them at Green Gate.  She gave me an oh crap look and took off running.  Meredith also ran up the hill without me to refill her pack and grab glasses and lights for the dark, which was yet to come.  After cresting at the top I realized that my crew had a handheld for me, but no pack.  They were frantically trying to transfer all the liquid to the pack that I had just had on along with all my gu, shot blocks, etc.  I stood there and watched as Rory looked at me.  I insisted that she go and she and her pacer took off downhill.  Between 2-3 minutes later Mer and I were off again.  There is no lying I was bummed, but I couldn't let this break me.  I knew in my mind I wouldn't see Rory again, that was just too much to make up on her.  I had to accept it and continue on, I had to fend off negative thoughts about my ability to stay strong.  I had to believe that I could continue to stay in front of Nikki and whomever else lurk close behind.  My crew and pacers had worked to hard for me to have a mental break down at this point.

GREEN GATE TO HIGHWAY 49 (Mile 79.8 to Mile 93.5)

With a fresh pack, a stashed headlamp and fuel we were off and running again.  I knew we would have to run the downhills strong so to not let Nikki make up too much time on me.  I kept hoping we would catch a glimpse or Rory in front of us, but it never happened.  Instead what happened was I heard Nikki and her pacer a few switch backs behind us.  Mer and I ceased our conversation so to be stealth and I started to grind the uphill climbs.  I put my head down and got after it until I felt comfortable enough that we had put some more distance between us.  

At the Auburn Lakes Trail aid station I was told that Rory was no longer running with Lizzy, but that she had passed her.  I was so excited for Rory, yes I will admit I have a girl crush and yes gentlemen she is single!  Again I weighed in right on my start weight and headed back to the trail without hesitation.  I believe it was just shy of Browns Bar (mile 89.9) that I had to turn my headlamp on.  The darkness slowed my pace a bit as my eyes were not stellar at this point, although I was pleased I had made it so far in the daylight.  Of course fairly far out from Browns Bar we could hear the aid station rocking. It is overwhelmingly loud for me with its blaring music and festivities so I gave my number, ran past the station and then pulled into the woods to pee while Mer grabbed some soda.  Somewhere between Browns Bar and Highway 49 I saw lights in front of us and was shocked to learn it was Lizzy and her pacer.  I wished her well and told her to stick with it as we made quick work at pulling away from them.  Shortly after I gave Mer an air high five as I was now in third.  Quickly after my exhilarating high my mind brought me back to reality as disbelief that had been hiding in the darkness came creeping back to me.  

HIGHWAY 49 TO THE TRACK! (Mile 93.5 to Finish)
After crossing the highway I knew that I still had the energy to power my way to the finish.  Last year I had been passed on the downhill to No Hands Bridge by Rory and this year I was determined to hold my position.  I wanted to run strong yet knew that I still had a few uphills to go.  Everything that seemed like Mount Everest after No Hands last year seemed like a frost heave this year.  I reminded myself just to stay focused and upright as a fall this late in the game could cost me several positions.  Mer continued to stay on me about hydration, salt and calories as we were going to do this right all the way to the finish line.  I gladly obeyed all her instructions as at this point my mental capabilities were far gone.  I knew exactly where we were yet need reminders of what was to come and how many more miles.  


This year when Mer and I reached Robie Point George and my mother were there to run us in.  I still had a lot in my legs so we powered up the pavement hill and then ran into the stadium after stopping once at an intersection wondering which way do we go, left or right?" Finally a car pointed us the correct direction by yelling "Go Left!"  My mom and Mer joined me on the track and Geo headed over to the finish line.  

As I rounded the final corner and made my way to the finish line there were cheers, applause and adoring fans grabbing for me.  Okay it was Glen and Rory, but I couldn't pass them by, not a chance. At this moment my aches and pains no longer existed, I felt weightless, but yes I still felt sticky and dirty.  By the way my ability to put captions on photos has ceased, silly Blogger, but credit is due because the shot above was taken by Emma Garrard from Salomon and the one below by Bob from Drymax.

I honestly had no idea how long I had been on course, until I caught a glimpse of the finish clock. Today I wasn't racing the clock, I wasn't really racing other competitors, but rather I was racing my race.  Today I was racing my doubt and fear to the finish line, and on this day I won.  This is something that dawned on me at the finish line when my coach Bryon Powell of irunfar.com hugged me.  Not only had others believed, not only had he believed, but most importantly I believed.  I learned that doubts are overwhelming and can they can be sneaky things.  They can linger and creep into your subconscious as they wear at you and tug hard enough to slow your pace, but standing up to them rather than running away helps defeat their strength.  


I cannot thank my family enough for dealing with me day after day.  They have continously supported my running and helped keep me in balance.   My husband George has been by my side constantly on my good days and bad days.  He has time after time picked me up when I have fallen, both mentally and physically.  My success is largely due to his faith in me because he always helps me see more clearly even on days were everything looks bleak.  My friends and training partners also play a pivotal role in my life, you guys are amazing.  Each steep I took was inspired by knowing you all were rooting for me.  I can never say enough kind words about my coach who has stuck with me. Bryon has been monumental in my growth and development, and has helped me in ways I could have never fathomed.  My crew of Geo, Nan-Nan and Jeff were amazing and helped keep me running on schedule and fueled, heck anyone who can tolerate my obsessive planning deserves a belt buckle.  And to my sponsors, Salomon, Drymax, Julbo and Eating and Living Healthy I couldn't do what I do day in and day out without your wonderful products and companies backing me.  My last shout out goes to Champlain Valley Cross Fit, thanks for showing me how important total body fitness is and to Green Mtn Rehab for keeping my body moving in the right direction.  Together "WE" finished Western States and for that I cannot give enough thanks.